How do I know what to do next? (When the old has gone, but the new isn’t here)

everything will be alright

 

When your life is changing…and what you thought you knew is falling away, but there is nothing yet in it’s place to make you feel safe, you will ask.. how do I know what to do next?

We’re in strong times.

There’s no doubt about it. Strong, wonderful, challenging, uplifting, confusing, elevating times.

The world it seems is changing ever and ever faster. In fact, what we can be sure of is, the world, and we, are changing, stretching growing going through what feels like rebirth after rebirth, grief after grief, illumination after illumination and then back around again.

Many people are asking questions of themselves and their lives they haven’t asked before.

You may have had a dream of how you thought your life should look – where you should be, what you should have achieved, who you should be, and you persistently chased that dream until it was yours. Maybe it made you very happy, maybe it didn’t but it’s your dream and your life.

But something may have happened that made you question it, or simply had it all come tumbling down. In these times of ascension where the influx of ascension energies to the planet are coming thick and fast, we are being called to wake up, to let go of the things that hold you back and let go of the identity of who you think you are based on your conditioning and the false messages of our society.

As you grow up you get so many messages from your parents, and families, and teachers and friends and television about your place in the world, what success means, what happiness should look like, what you are worth – but this old programming is beginning to fall away. Either on purpose (ish) as you grow on your spiritual path, or quite spontaneously.

You may become unenthused by the job you always loved

You may question is how you are living your life is actually how you really want it to be

You may question your sexuality

Or your relationship

Or the friends you have around you.

You may find that the dream you have been pursuing suddenly isn’t working

Or a loved one passes away and you question if you want to live at all

You may find that an old wound isn’t healed

Or you’re experiencing burnout

Or you become ill and your world as you knew it stops.

Even the structure of our monetary system & political systems seem to be swaying.

The door is closing on what you thought you knew. The old you seems to be falling away, and with it may go relationships, long held beliefs, paycheques and control. And you are left floundering.

It may have come out of nowhere… who am I?  What do I even want anymore, why can’t I decide what to do with my life. If this sounds like you, you may be in what Iyanla Vanzant calls ‘The Meantime’.

 

iyanla lose everything

 

I do a fair bit of my spiritual coaching with people in this place. They just need a reminder that they’re not losing their mind, & that when the old has fallen away, sometimes the new does not present itself immediately.

You want to be in control, you want a plan, you want to know what’s gonna happen next, you want to know what direction to move in to next, but sometimes gestation is necessary.

There’s often this in between space, where you are free falling. The sand is shifting under your feet, and you desperately want to hold on to a new idea, a new story of who you are, a new identity, to feel safe.

We are of course, very attached to who we think we are, I mean, it’s who you are, what you do, all that you know, what everyone knows you for.

What if it’s not.

What if that’s not who you are, but something you were doing, or a role you were playing, or wasn’t meant to be forever. What if you could transition in to a deeper part of you that is more authentic, real, raw and vibrant. What if there’s a part of you yet undiscovered, what if it’s time for that old part of your life to be gently released so a new version of you can come in.

Maybe you get to a place where you think: “I don’t know who I am anymore.”  You’re not excited by the things that used to drive you, but nothing new has come in it’s place to drive you forward. You feel like maybe you are losing it a bit. It’s the ego that is losing it’s grip on you and it’s terrified. But you are not what the ego thinks it is, you are spiritual being having a human experience, and there is so much more to you than you have been lead to believe.

Rather than force it to come, the clarity, which you can’t, I mean you just can’t; you have to wait. In that god awful meantime space, you have to sit, while your conditioned beliefs are being peeled away, where life is squeezing out of you like a lemon the lies you believed or told, the pain you hid, and the places inside you that are not aligned with love so the true authentic you can be revealed. Maybe you just get the feeling that something is off but you can’t put your finger on it.

Rebirth after rebirth, grief after grief, illumination after illumination and then again. 

You’re in at the deep end, and you can’t turn back now.

You are being cracked open to the real, raw, vulnerable you. And it’s f***ing painful. And confusing. You don’t have to have all the answers; the planet is under going all kinds of cosmic upgrades and what is not light is being revealed for transformation.

And it’s OK to not know what to do, or where to go next. You’ve never been here before, why would you know?

Know that you’re in the meantime, and while it feels like everyone else is going from strength to strength and is setting goals and making milestones, you just listen for truth.

Listen in to your life and deepest heart for your truth. Rest. Relax. Make it your dominant intention to feel good. Have fun. Meditate, and be in nature. Reach out to people. Share your journey. We’re all in this together, and we all have these moments at different times. Connect from your heart. Tell the truth. Ponder on what your new priorities might be.

Allow the seed to take root.

You are being invited to turn inwards rather than look outwards for your comfort and answers.

 

marianne

 

Just be, for a while. 

When you allow yourself to be in the present, and make it your only intention to take care of yourself, eventually the storm will pass and the road will become clear. But you have to be clear to do that, and that means taking care of yourself.

It may not happen as quick as you’d like but it will eventually happen. But I know, it’s excruciating being in that place, especially if you’re a top notch go getter and doer.

Lissa Rankin said:

If you get overwhelmed, rest in the sanctuary of your blown open heart, where you will know that this stripping down is not a punishment; it is an answer to a silent prayer for freedom that you may not even remember praying.

It’s just not something you can rush, and if you do, you’ll get slapped down anyway!

Life wants to take you on a tremendous journey, it’s just not the route you imagined, so for now just rest and don’t worry about how do I know what to do next so much. As you make it your dominant intention to feel good, to give yourself time and rest you will eventually get back into the flow and connect with life in a deeper way.

You’ll eventually know what to do next, when you are in a clear internal space, and it’s your time to move forward.